Dreams

Before you get all antsy, I’m not doing one of those artsy things where I interpret the dreams, and act like I have all this mystical knowledge, because if you don’t know by now that i have mystical knowledge, there’s no hope for you. Instead, what I plan to do is write about the effects of dreams on the person (that is, me), the day or days after they occurred.

So, first up, I begin to realise exactly how much of myself this could potentially reveal about myself, but with my usual short sighted self sabotage, I decide I couldn’t be arsed about the future consequences. Also, damn, look at the alliteration on short sighted self sabotage. Awesome.

Anyway, the real first up is a dream wherein my brother really, really pissed me off. I mean, to the point where, in the dream, I kicked his laptop over the shed. In real life, needless to say, kicking a laptop, especially one thats apparently madeof weight and lead would probably hurt a lot more than it would move over a shed. Regardless, I was pissed. And so, when I woke up the next day, I staggered out of my bed to get some coffee, saw my brother, and gave him the finger. When he (entirely reasonably) enquired as to why I was so angry, I told him to shut the hell up, then stormed off. Showed him, eh? That’ll learn him for….

Wait, shit. I didn’t kick his laptop over the shed, he’s using it now. I had a dream where I was pissed at him and now I’m actually pissed at him in real life. Unfortunately for my relations with my brother that day, that knowledge did not abate my anger in the slightest, it just made me feel guilty when I saw him.

Next up, a dream wherein I found true love. Now, you may think that I may be overstating this a bit, but it seriously seemed like, holy shit, life was about to get really good. However, I was at that moment shaken awake by my father, who told me that I had to leave for school. And thus began one of the shittiest days of my life. I can’t even begin to remember the dream itself, but I have a strong reminder of the feeling, and after comparing it with my current situation, needless to say, I became very depressed.

And this was not something that was around for a day and then was gone the next day. No, this was a feeling that hung around for weeks, and generally speaking, highlighted the more annoying parts of my life.

Thirdly, a dream which still haunts me to this day. It happened a few years back now, and let me tell you, it may well have been one of the major traumatic events of my life. My family, for reasons entirely unknown to me, was holding some kind of social gathering, with children playing and everyone laughing and generally being happy. And I was happy too, playing with the littl’uns without a care in the world.

And then, I looked up. I saw a whole other planet, ringed with red smoke and fire, comets orbiting it as it began it’s slow descent towards Earth. Towards my house. Towards me. And in that instant, I knew that everything I owned, everything I cared about, everything I loved, was absolutely, 100%, without a doubt fucked. And all the while, the kids kept playing, the adults kept chatting amiably. And even as I watched, the planet moved slowly closer and closer.

Obviously, goddamnit. The whole “Planet coming to fuck up all your shit” idea has pervaded every single thing I do, especially in one of my most beloved mediums, gaming. In Morrowind, I look up to see a moon with a red planet apparently sitting right next to it

Now, these two things obviously could not exist side by side, gravity being alive and well in Morrowind. So obviously, this planet was a new enitity, and the fact that it appeared to be headed right to-fucking-wards me meant that it was going to collide with my planet, which I was currently inhabiting and was enjoying not being destroyed. Therefore, shitshitshitshit. My brain flew through this train of thought in roughly one planck moment, then decided the best way to deal with this was to completely lock up every one of my muscles for ten seconds while I stared at the planet in mute horror.

Needless to say, my body is an idiot sometimes. And this is hardly the only time this has happened. Spore is one game that seems to delight in making me require new pants, and plenty of other games seem to think my sanity is unnecessary.

Anyway, that’s about all that I feel like writing right now, and I feel like I’ve said far too much for me to be posting this online. But hey, self sabotage, right? Lets see how this goes.